I wear my sunglasses at night

Who doesn't love a good display of sunglasses? Husband. Unless they're $10 sunglasses.

Actually, I do not. But, I heard the Corey Hart song on the radio yesterday and started thinking about sunglasses.

You know how you always hope (and sometimes pray) that your loved ones never face any addictions in their lifetimes? Or, if they do, that they’ll be able to overcome them and not struggle forever?

Well, Husband has an addiction. He’s addicted to shopping for sunglasses. And, not just any kinds of sunglasses, but ones that are polarized, provide UVA/UVB protection, provide minimal peripheral blockage, fit his larger-than-average-size head closely, wrap around his head correctly and have fortified hinges.

Also, they must cost no more than $10. $5 is ideal.

Ever shopped for sunglasses? That’s a pretty hefty list of “must haves” to set your top price at $10. But, Husband is determined. If he’s going to spend money on shades, they have to fit all of his requirements and be cheap. Because you never know when you’re going to accidentally drop them, sit on them, step on them or crush them in your hand after they fly off of your head during a rollercoaster ride and you manage to whisk them to safety in the nick of time only to pulverize them in excitement.

Hey, it’s happened.

Husband is a sunglasses-kind-of guy. He’s always wearing them. Sunny days. Partly sunny days. Less than sunny days. Bright, sunless days. Shades are on. Which means we have cheap-o sunglasses lying all over the place. Stashed in cars. On the side table in the foyer. Under the coffee table in the living room. On the dining room table (also in the living room). All over. And, it never fails; if we stop in a store, and that store has a display of sunglasses, Husband gravitates to it. Because he’s always looking for a better pair at a better price.

Way back in February, he broke the lone pair of sunglasses that he took with us on vacation. They were a favourite pair. So, we struck out on a quest and struck out again and again as prices topped $20. Then we got to Cozumel. He scored a pair for $12. Oakleys. Riiiiiiight.

They worked, but it wasn’t a match made in heaven (also they were totally not Oakleys), so we continued looking. Back in Florida, he caved and purchased a pair of Foster Grants that were on sale for $23. They met all of his requirements and were perfect. Until the following day when one of the hinges came loose.

Come on, Foster Grant!

Rather than take them back, which we should have done, he “fixed” them. With some sort of Crazy Glue. Which worked for a week or so. And then they were glued again. And then the entire arm just popped off. Ugh.

Back on the hunt.

We scour TJMaxx(es), Winners(s), Targets, Wal-Marts and other value stores looking for an excellent deal. And, every so often, we find an excellent deal. Inevitably, the “excellent deal” is excellent for a few weeks and then the excellency fades as the truth comes to light. They’re not quite as comfortable as he’d like. They don’t wrap as closely to his head as he’d like. They give him headaches.

Something tells me that if we add up the cost of all the sunglasses purchased, we could’ve sprung for a really nice pair that met every last one of his expectations. But, that doesn’t involve a good deal. And, Husband is all about a good deal.

And, so, our quest for the perfect pair of $10 sunglasses continues. As does the addiction.

Pray for Husband. Pray for me.

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2 thoughts on “I wear my sunglasses at night

  1. Mom says:

    Praying starts now. Husband will find the exact pair of sunglasses that meet ALL of the specifications and for a cheap price to boot. In fact, they will last and last so long that he will wish they would break so he could get another pair but, much to his chagrin, they will not break no matter what he does with them. Oh yes, the praying starts now.

  2. Neil B says:

    Actually, there are “sun”glasses you can wear at light. Very light brilliant yellow or yellow-green lenses cut glare (violet and in best case, long red as well) and sharpen vision (suppress chromatic aberration in eye) while admitting plenty of blue and blue green in the 450-550 nm range for good night vision. I wear them and they work great, don’t be misled by simple-minded complaints of “how could they work” etc.

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